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dark Mulder

I'm gonna die

It's 3 AM. Today was grocery day and I was gone for literally 12 hours. Hoping to avoid passenger chatter, I took the earliest bus. More people than usual were riding, but, lo and behold! The ride was quiet. I was content.

I got held up at the diagnostics place because my clinic hadn't faxed my blood work request.

Vital wheat gluten was at the discount grocery store, so I made good use of my food stamps in the protein department. At the gourmet grocery store, I finally found some tortillas that don't have preservatives in them! Hooray. Now I can have burritos every day. I'm pinning my health hopes on this increase in protein.

Yesterday evening, I stuffed myself with a pizza that had an insanely thick crust, then rolled over and zonked out for a few hours. Woke up at 1 AM thirsty but also in need of electrolytes. My body told me that water wouldn't cut it. I went out in hopes that one of our three local liquor stores was open, but was disappointed. So I just had some chilled water (I usually prefer it at room temp; air force boot camp ruined cold water for me). I don't know what I'm doing now. I vaguely feel that I cannot or should not go to sleep.

Oh yeah. And the itchy things on my skin. They don't look like rashes, but the skin is red and there is like one bump for each spot. One on each arm, one underneath the right side of my rib cage. I think there was one on my leg too, but I can't remember where at the moment. Totally random.

Then I had something on the right edge of my tongue, like the irritation from eating sour candies, except I hadn't eaten any sour candies. The skin on my tongue is torn; I've done that before while eating tortilla chips, and I had some day before yesterday. I don't know what to think because these resemble two of the symptoms the rheumatologist told me to look for.

I guess I'll try to go to sleep now. Mildly excited to see how
much protein I'll be packing into a day tomorrow.